2020-12-05

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2020-12-05 11:28 pm
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It feels very odd to realize just how much I take things for granted when it comes to other people. How do I make room for anybody, anyone, when I can't even make room for myself at regular intervals? What I'm trying to say is that I don't quite know my new limits, energy-wise, since using the cpap and using a new bed. Thus, my reality is altered into pain of overextending myself beyond. well. anything else I thought I could do. So I end up getting very little done of what I actually wanted to do.

In other words: my CPAP "malfunctioned" because we got a new bed and frame and now have no headboard to drape the hose connecting the mask to the machine, thus causing breathing issues for me overnight/sleep apnea acting up. This resulted in a small, yet exhausting, existential crisis for me when I fell back into being as tired today as I was when I didn't use the cpap at all. WTH, self??